Life On the Shelf

There are a couple of bowls in my cabinet that Gene and I got as presents when we were married. I use these bowls all the time. They are the perfect size for mixing, serving, storing, or whatever else I need. Here’s the thing… these bowls are old. They are an odd color of yellow with green designs. They are dated. Every once and a while one of my children tell me that it is time to get some new bowls, but  I like these bowls a lot. It would actually never occur to me to NOT use them.  Old and a bit ugly aside, they are still as useful now as when they were given to us.

I am going to be painfully honest now. (This would be a great time to stop reading if you can’t handle bare honesty.) I feel very much like my bowls lately. Old and a bit ugly, put on the shelf because it seems that my usefulness isn’t needed. (I did warn you.) I am constantly questioning my own motives. I want, more than I can express to be useful in the kingdom of God and the ministry of my church. There are things that I feel great passion for in ministry.  I am not one given to breaking into tears, but get me talking about the things that I am most passionate about and I can cry a bucket full in no time at all.

But what happens when your gifts are not needed. What happens when your usefulness is questioned. What happens when you are put on the shelf. Trust me when I tell you that I know all the right answers. We have been in ministry for close to 30 years. I recognize the seasons of ministry. The seasons of life.  However, I am coming to see that perhaps we as the church have acquiesced to our culture in ways that we should never allow.  Old and a bit ugly does not equal useless. Out of date does not mean ready for the retirement home or trash bin.

I have always believed and lived out, “If there is a job that needs to be done, don’t wait for someone else to do it. Don’t call the janitor if there is a spill, clean it up.” There are some things that I do because they need to be done. I know how to do them.  I might even be good at those jobs. But these things are not the tasks that I have a Spirit-filled passion. I will continue to do whatever is needed but I need to be deeply immersed in ministry that God has granted me passion to be involved in. It gives me fire to sustain the jobs that I may not feel a great passion to do.

As the wife of a pastor I have learned to keep silent about most things to preserve the unity of the body. I hold that as one of my highest priorities. I am taking a chance of being misunderstood for expressing my grief. My reasoning for this post is that if I feel this way, there must be others in the Body who feel the same. Maybe some aren’t feeling old and a bit ugly, maybe it is more scarred and broken, or too young and inexperienced, or whatever condition you are in. I pray that the church will be looking for people that are passionate about the Gospel, passionate about ministry, but have been delegated to shelf duty. We need these folks more than ever.  And those on the shelf need to be active again.

Or… it could be that I am guilty of “thinking too highly of myself.” And if that is so, maybe a little more time on the shelf is what is needed.



“ For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.” Romans 12:3-8


I would love to hear your thoughts,


Kat