I Have

I have known the pain of abuse

I have felt the fear of being alone, even in a crowd

I have known the sadness of being different, of being misunderstood

I have felt what it means to be poor

I have known the anguish of being told there would probably be no children from my womb

I have felt the pain of being betrayed

I have known physical pain and the emotional pain of no diagnosis, no cure

I have felt helpless as I have watched others suffer and grieve

I have known the unconditional love of my husband

I have felt the joy of my children’s births and adoption and entering my life through marriage to my son

I have known the unbelievable, amazing delight of being called mommy and mom

I have felt the unexplainable desire to see someone else succeed even if it means that I lose

I have known what it is to have many friends

I have felt accepted and cared for

I have known the excitement of seeing new places, people, and cultures

I have felt the love of a church family

I have known what it is to have more than I need

I have felt what it is to have friends that I could not fathom my life without

I have known what it is to love deeply people that I rarely see, that live in different states and countries.

I have known the Indescribable love of the Father

I have felt the love that drew me, separated me, died and rose again for me, chose, adopted, redeemed and sealed me for eternity.

That in all these things, I, Kat Cornett would be to the Praise of His Glory! 

Jesus and Rapunzel

When Noelle and I sit down for breakfast or lunch on weekdays there is always something that she wants to spend the entire time talking about. Usually I have to remind her to eat because she becomes so distracted by the conversation. Children, especially young children learn from these early times of conversation as to whether or not they are allowed to ask questions, get answers, or just talk with no real purpose at all except being with mom and/or dad. So I have always tried to let my children talk. When Will was this age he wanted to talk about Legos and baseball. When Hannah was little she wanted to talk about animals and people. Both Will and Hannah would talk with me about the Bible and how they loved Jesus.  They would talk for a while then finished their meal and be off to play.

Having Noelle has been somewhat different. She literally talks all day long. Once she has something on her mind there is no distracting her until she has answers or has worn that conversation out.

Yesterday as we were sitting down for lunch she ask me to pray.  I said that I would but before I could start she said, “Mommy, I want you to ask Jesus in your heart again.”  I told her, “Noelle, we don’t have to ask Jesus into our hearts more than one time. When we ask Him to come into our hearts, forgive us of our sins, He doesn’t ever leave us.”  But she again said, “Mommy, I want you to ask Jesus in your heart just one more time.”  I said, “Noelle, really. The Bible says that once we ask Jesus in our hearts nothing can ever separate us from Him. I really don’t need to ask Him to come into my heart again, He’s already there.”  “Mommy, Please, I just want to hear you ask Jesus into your heart.”  

It was then that I figured out what was going on with my sweet girl. About three weeks ago Noelle had ask Jesus into her heart and now she just needed to be sure that when “it was her turn” to go to heaven (as she says) that I was going to be there too.

So, I prayed and thanked Jesus that He had come into my heart, had forgiven my sin, cleaned my heart, and now lives in my heart until the day it is my turn to go to heaven and live there forever with Him. That was apparently what she needed to hear because when I finished praying she smiled and said , “Mom, do you want to play Rapunzel with me?”

I Look Like Who?

Recently, I have experienced an interesting, if not disturbing phenomena. Several times, more than I would care to admit, while talking to our children and church family my dear husband and I have said the same things at the same time…verbatim. Now don’t get me wrong. I love my husband and have the deepest respect for him. But I never expected that we would be merging into the same personality!

I am quite sure that you, my dear readers have heard of or even seen people that after being married for a long time seem to begin to look alike. Or even more drastic, pet owners who look like their pets. Admittedly this is both amusing and frightening.

Not long ago, as I was doing my Bible study I came across this passage:

2 Corinthians 3: 12-18

^{"Therefore, since we have such a hope, we are very bold.We are not like Moses, who would put a veil over his face to prevent the Israelites from seeing the end of what was passing away. But their minds were made dull, for to this day the same veil remains when the old covenant is read. It has not been removed, because only in Christ is it taken away. Even to this day when Moses is read, a veil covers their hearts. But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."} 

When Moses spent time alone with God on Mount Sinai receiving the Ten Commandments the Bible says that “he was not aware that his face was radiant (reflecting divine glory) because he had spoken with the Lord.”

Exodus 34:29

Though this was a fading glory it returned each time that he spent time alone with God. In verse 18 of 2 Corinthians 3 the Bible says that we reflect God’s glory because “we are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”

This is not fading glory because the Spirit of God resides in us. It is ever-increasing so that we, you and I, are becoming more and more like Christ every day.

In his book, Just like Jesus Max Lucado puts it this way:

“As we walk with God, we take on His thoughts, His principles, His attitudes. We take on His heart.”

This is amazing, incredible news for all of us!

Maybe this means that Gene has not done a “mind-meld” on me, but that as we are growing in our faith and relationship with Jesus Christ, we are both becoming more like Christ and reflecting Him. We are both starting to think, look, and talk like Him.

I certainly hope that is the case for many reasons. One being, I just don’t think that Gene’s head on my body is going to work!

Who do you look like?

A Barn, a '55 Chevy Truck and a Corn Field

I am sitting in our car riding through the mountains of Virginia. I know that there are many people who love to go on vacation with their families but detest the car ride to get to their destination. Not me. I love it. It is actually my favorite part of vacation. I love getting to see the mountains, rolling hills, fields, animals, churches, houses, and old barns. (I have a thing for old barns!) I like seeing Christmas trees, peanuts, corn, tomatoes and all variety of vegetables growing in neat rows. Some big farms and some small, some the size of the row or two that grow in my yard. I love seeing architecture from years past or months past. I like seeing old tractors, old cars, beat up old dump trucks and if I happen to see a ’55 Chevy truck, oh my! (I have a thing for those, too!)

All of these things make it nice to travel by car, but they are not my favorite reason for our trips.

The best part of traveling this way is time. Time with my husband. Time with my children. Time to think and reflect and pray where there are no other things demanding my attention. Time to talk and plan and dream. Time to laugh. Time for listening to “Adventures in Odyssey” and book recordings. 

Our vacations offer something else that we let get squeezed out in our day to day living… quiet. There are sometimes hours of no one speaking at all. We are just being together. Breathing together. Being family. I love that!

I would like to recommend this for every family.  Yes, there are times when we get grouchy and get on each other’s nerves, but it is funny how even those times make the fondest of memories.

No Covert Christianity Here

Several weeks ago our family was invited to have dinner at  one of our church member's home. We started the evening as many dinners do, chatting, laughing and waiting for the meal to be completed. However, soon Gene and I began to notice that we quickly exited normal conversation. As we sat around the table each person began to talk of Jesus. About how their relationship with Him has altered the projection of their lives. They spoke of details of life before God broke through and offered a full, meaningful life. I sat in awe and, though not normally given to public emotion, found tears filling my eyes. There were no grand proclamations of revival in the invitation to dinner, but as the evening progressed from one story of God's grace to the next, I felt the Holy Spirit beginning a symphony of praise and worship that surely was reviving my love and adoration for Jesus. I wondered at the openness, the soul level honesty of these dear people. Then it struck both Gene and myself. We were in the midst of people from other cultures that knew none of our American "political correctness". These amazing believers were just doing what came natural to them. Telling their stories of Christ redeeming love for them. 
As we left to return home that evening, we realized that we were the only two Caucasian people there. We were and are honored at the privilege of being in their presence.
How much we could learn from people of other cultures if we allowed ourselves! Open conversations about our love for Jesus, our indebtedness to His grace, our gratitude for His suffering, our awe at His choosing! 
Oh, Father may it be so! 

"I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all your wonderful deeds. I will be glad and exult in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High."  Psalm 9:1-2

On Missing Church

Today I am at home.

A few days ago I picked up some sort of virus that now has decided that it is rather happy and wants to stay and wreak havoc with my respiratory system. So here I am sitting in my bed instead of being in church.
Even though sleep was illusive last night, I got up early, got our four year old ready and sent her to church with her daddy.
After their departure, I decided to push through the fog of this annoying, unpleasant malady and get ready and go to church, too. I took a shower, put on make-up, and... that's it. By this point I am completely exhausted. Now I am very tired and sad as well.
I hate missing church. My four year old would be appalled to know that I used the word "hate", but in this instance it is true.
For my spiritual well-being I need the opportunity to worship corporately,to study the Bible with other people, to hear the Word of God preached by an anointed pastor, and have community with the family of Christ.
My heart is to be in fellowship with other believers. My soul needs the strong challenge of digging deep into the Word of God with accountability. I need to be involved in ministry with my church family reaching out with the Gospel to the world around us.
And my church needs me. Even though I am broken, messed up, and sinful, my church still needs me. Because I am a part of the body. I am needed or the body of my local church will not be whole. 
I love my church family because they know me and (for some crazy reason) they want to know me more. They love me.(Not completely sure about their sanity.) They laugh with me and some times, we all laugh at me. In my moments of grief since we have been here, they have loved me through it. They let me be me, but hopefully will not allow me to remain stagnant.

Hebrews 10:23-25

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds,  not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another —and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

I need to be with my church family and they need me. But I'm guessing that for this one day, they will be glad that I am at home and not creating another hazardous material zone.

Who Am I?

This is an earlier post. I am doing a re-run to help new friends get to know me.

Not long ago I was ask to define what I believe to be my role as a Pastor/Elder's wife. The following is my answer to that question.

About 15 years ago I had a head injury that led to me having to reevaluate who I was and am.

What I discovered was that I had a wrong idea about who I was. I thought I was: Kat the wife, Kat the Mom, the Sunday School teacher, the worship leader, the choir member, etc…

When the injury happened I wasn’t able to do most of those things, and any of them very well. For Years!  I spent many days literally on my face in my kitchen floor crying out to God.  Through that experience God has taught me that I am NOT the things that I do.  And that MOST importantly who I am is His child.

I realized that even being Gene’s wife and my children's mom is all dependent on and greatly influenced by, my relationship as daughter to the King of Kings. When that relationship is progressing and good, all of the other relationships and roles in my life are more Kingdom honoring.  When I allow other things to get ahead of my relationship with Jesus Christ, everything else in my life suffers.

Ephesians 5:8-10

"For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth)  and find out what pleases the Lord."

I hope to live as a child of the Light who spends my life finding out what pleases my Father.

So in light of this, I see my role: to be an encourager out of the overflow of my relationship with Christ and to live as transparently as I know how. (You will never have to wonder what I think, just ask.) I believe that if I can encourage, extend grace, live with joy, live at peace (as much as it depends on me), be a faith-full woman and to love people to the best of my ability then I will be fulfilling my calling as a wife, mom, pastor's wife, AND for any other adventure that God may have for me.

Once Upon a Time

Years past

Young man, brown eyes, brown hair

Tall and handsome

You caught my attention

Time passes

Your gentleness, openness

Authenticity

You won my admiration

Your heart for God

You captured my heart

Infatuation grows to love

Love grows to commitment

Marriage begins

We become one

Learning to love

Leaving familiar

Excitement and wonder

Our Son

Oh the joy!

Tiny hands, dark eyes, dark hair

Watching you become Daddy

Family

Love grows

Arguments and walls

Forgiveness and maturity

Commitment grows

Virginia home

Church family

Ministry

Our daughter

Overwhelming joy!

Tiny feet, brown eyes, blonde hair

Daddy’s baby girl

Beautiful

Loving, living

Moments of pain

Of grief, heartache, loneliness

Lifetime of joy

Laughter, companionship, and adventure

Our daughter

Surprised and joy-full!

Waiting…Black eyes, black hair

Baba and baby

Grateful

Time marches

Giving, loving

Grief, pain

Living

Our daughter

Chosen by our son

Beauty and grace, brown eyes, black hair

Watching and learning from you

Blessed again with joy

Changes

Leaving

New vision, new place

Precious, peaceful

Loving and being loved

Growth

Fulfill calling, inner peace

Pastor, Elder

Hope, encourage, love

My husband

My friend, my love

My mentor, coach, counselor

Pastor, provider

My hero

Gene,

I am so grateful for you. God has blessed us far beyond our ability to imagine. I will thank God for you as long as there is breath in me.

I love you forever!

Kat

A Place of Peace

 The day we moved in to our new house, Gene and I took time to pray that God would bless our home.We also prayed that He would make it a place of peace and rest. That it would be a place where Jesus would honored and people would feel welcome.
A few weeks ago we had the privilege of helping a friend through a difficult time. From both our friend and the friend who brought her to us came the comment, "Your home feels so peaceful."
I have been thinking about what exactly makes any of us feel peace? Is it a nice house that smells new? Probably not. Is it getting away from the circumstances that rob us of peace? Maybe, but if that were really true then we would not continually rerun painful and hurtful conversations or events in our minds. I believe that perhaps it has more to do with each of us getting in a position to receive peace from God.
I just read a blog by a dear friend that speaks to this so well that I am hoping that you will continue reading at this site: http://www.raceandtask.com/
My continuing prayer is that God will use us and this home as a place where people can get in a position to comprehend and adhere to the "Stories of Peace."

Thank you, Rick Lin for your faithfulness in running the race and giving us a glimpse of all that God is doing in and through you.

A Time to Mourn and a Time to Dance

This post was actually written about three weeks ago. I felt that I needed time to process before I posted it. I know that many people go through life changes, so hopefully, prayerfully, this will be of benefit.




Today is my day for grief. It is not that I set it on the calendar, Kat's Grief Day. It just is. In spite of my mind's constant arguing that it is illogical. It still is. 

Let me explain. 

Before we adopted our precious daughter, the Adoption Agency mandated (Thankfully) that we go through classes to help prepare us for adopting. One of these classes was about Loss and Grief.  For every person, there are losses in their life, and they included everything from death of a family member, loosing ability to function as we once did due to aging, loosing relationships. etc... With every loss comes grief. For example... We loose the ability to open a jar without help, then there will be the grief of facing our humanity and inevitable mortality. These concepts are not new, nor morbid, they just are a part of being human. 

For the past several months there have been many changes in my life, in our lives as a family. I am not typically one who minds change. I am convinced in my soul that with every change comes the benefit of knowing God in a new way. Today, in spite of this deep conviction, my heart is set on grieving. 

The process of moving from one place and era of my life has been long, grueling at times, and consumed with activity.  This past Thursday we closed on our former residence and officially moved. We are still living a nomadic existence, waiting on the new house to be finished.  But in the minds of most, including myself, this was a closing of sorts on the old and a beginning of the new. 

Before I continue, let me remind all 6 or 7 of you who read my blog, I am still completely convinced that we are exactly in the place we are supposed to be. However, there has been loss in our lives, my life these past few months. The loss of home. Home, not just the place but the position.  Home,  the place of familiarity. The place of routine. The place of purpose.
There has also been the loss of ministry. I have been one of the worship leaders in our previous church for years. I feel a huge passion for leading 
God's people in authentic worship. I am grieving the loss of that ministry. 
I know that this is a time of being still, of refining. But, it is a loss for me to grieve. I also know deep in my soul that God has designed the human heart. With that heart He has assured me that there is a time for everything, a time to mourn and a time to dance. 
So right now I will grieve the losses and look forward to the time when I can once again celebrate the new adventure that God has for me and my family. 

" There is a time for everything, 
 and a season for every activity under the heavens:

 a time to be born and a time to die,
 a time to plant and a time to uproot,
 a time to kill and a time to heal,
 a time to tear down and a time to build,
 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
 a time to mourn and a time to dance"

Ecclesiastes 3:1-4

Blessed are those who dwell in Your house

One closing date for our home has passed and one somewhere in the future. I am taking a few moments to inventory all the huge amount of people and things God has put in my life.

 I have the most amazing family. I am married to the most godly man I have ever met, who loves me so much more than I deserve. I have an awesome son and daughter-in-law, who constantly amaze and humble me with their desire to serve God through serving people. I have an absolutely gorgeous daughter who loves God with all her heart, who is completely unaware of her beauty, who has an astounding ability to love people no matter what. I have a beautiful little Asian princess daughter who always leaves me with my jaw on the floor at the depth of insight that God has given to her at such a young age. I am so thankful for my family. 

 I have friends that know me and still love me unconditionally. I have a new church family that I am growing more in love with every day. I have extended family that I love and, well, they are stuck with me.

 Considering there are 4.5 million refugees in Sudan, nearly 2 million refugees in Somalia, between 3 and 5 million in Columbia, between 1 to 3 million in Iraq, and almost 2 million in the Congo, also that there are somewhere near 145 million orphans in the world, I have absolutely everything!

 I am humbled! I am grateful! I am moved to repentance! I pray that my heart would continually see the world through God's eyes. That I could have a heart that aches and grieves for refugees and orphans and widows. That as I sit here in a house that is warm, with food in my stomach, I would be Jesus' hands and feet to the world around me. I pray for forgiveness when I am consumed with myself when there are millions who have neither home, nor family, nor the awareness of the One who can fill every need. And may my deepest longing be to dwell in Your house, Oh God my Father!

 Psalm 84:2-4 My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the LORD; my heart and my flesh cry out  for the living God.  Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself,  where she may have her young,  a place near your altar, LORD Almighty, my King and my God.  Blessed are those who dwell in your house; they are ever praising you.

New International Version (NIV)

Back to blogging

To look at the date of the last post one would think that I have no thoughts or anything to say. Maybe Kat just sits around relaxing, eating Bon-bons (whatever they are), taking up space on a crowded planet. While I am taking up space on this planet, relaxing and eating the infamous Bon-bons has not been in my schedule.
As I have recorded in the previous post, my family is moving. So for the past few months I have been painting, repairing,  and getting the house ready to sell. I have searched, searched and searched some more until I found a house for our family to move to. I have packed all our belongings.  I have supervised the moving and storing of said belongings. (Thank you to all the Seaford folks for all the help in packing, moving and cleaning! Thank you to the men from Bethany Place for your help in moving and storage!)
This past week I chose carpet and countertops for our house. And now after months of insane busyness, I get to relax. So, here I sit trying to think of something worthy of posting to take everyone's time and attention, and to be honest, "I got nothing!" So, all that is left for me to say now is... Pass the Bon-Bons!!!