I Wonder
I wonder what will be said about me at my funeral service
I wonder if my children will know how much I have loved them
I wonder if my husband has any idea of the deep respect and unending love that I have for him
I wonder if I have adequately been able to convey my love for my friends
I wonder if my church family knows how grateful that I am for their acceptance and love
I wonder if walking the fine line of keeping confidences had made me seem closed
I wonder if the pain of walking through tragedy has etched scars on my face
I wonder if being fiercely protective of my family has given the appearance of being cold
I wonder if friends or family walked a day feeling what I feel, experiencing what I live, would bring surprise
Would anyone believe my grief over my sin
Would there be embarrassment at the desperation I feel to live a life of worship
Would there be pity for the things that I have yet to overcome
I wonder if I have laughed, cried, celebrated, seen, heard, grieved, or loved as I should
I wonder if I have honored God
I wonder if I have advanced the kingdom of God
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